Toning it down… Yes, that means less dramatic contouring, too. I should not be able to see the race track down your nose every time your turn your head. Sometimes less weave is more. Do you really need 5 bundles? At this point, some chicks are 96% hair, eyelashes and lips. No more mesh, lace and cut-out Instagram boutique “dresses”. If the only thing the dress covers is your tits, ass and future kids, you’re doing it wrong. *There are more convincing ways to let people know you are comfortable in your skin and value your sexual freedom. I’m not saying covering up is somehow better. I’m am saying that you’re going to probably sit down and catch something, when you ride the subway home. Think twice about whether you really want to spend $200 on that 28 inch, platinum blonde Kanekalon lacefront wig. And if you do decide to make that “investment”, at least do the public a grande service of wearing it at least 2 inches from your eyebrows. Sometimes less is more.
Less trends & more lasting style… Remember when everyone bought those neon shirts with obscene jokes on them, tutus, long socks, color scrunchies and listened to LMFAO. In 5 years, you will look just as moronic, if you follow this year’s wave of generally accepted idiocy. Go classic. Classic always survives the photo album test. Take a few pieces from each year and pair them with what you already know works.
The “whores” and the “nuns” defending eachother… I love the force of girl power. The time we spend rashing each other out and screenshotting our Facebook arguments can be used on empowering each other an breaking stereotypes. For years, guys have tried to fit us all into two categories: the virginals and the jezebels. Either you’re a good girl or a bad girl. Other than the fact that this is completely calculated bullshit, it has managed to turn us women against each other. Time to stop that. Stop using sex workers and transgendered women as an excuse to hurl slurs, discriminate or cause physical harm. Support all sisters. Even the ones: that are without hourglass figures, breasts, all their functional limbs, all their clothes or any children. The ones that can’t find their shade of concealer in most stores, the ones with coarse hair, the ones with too many allergies, the ones with unusual jobs and strict religions too.
Decoration of black girls! I am here for happy black girls enjoying their shrinkage and marveling in their own melanin flawlessness. Put sea shells, crowns, flowers and more color into your natural hair. Carry on being the local virtility goddess you are.
Being selfish sometimes! No more heartfelt facebook statuses. No more 10-piece Twitter rants. No more tequila-fueled drunk dialing. No more shitty instagram relationship memes (No. Really. I HATE those with a fiery passion). Just get up, get out and live. People always want what they can’t have. Once he sees that he is no longer top priority (and is actually easily replaceable) he’ll either buckle up or leave – in which case you either win for dropping dead weight or win for straightening him up. An eye for an eye, mamita!
Being more clear…Say no more often. Say what you want, when you want it (but consider your surroundings). Don’t beat around the bush or suggest otherwise to be polite. If you don’t wish to be bothered, say it. If you think someone’s not funny, express that in a mature way. If you think someone is trying to manipulate you or the situation, say it. Someone trying too hard to charm you out of your underwear? Say it. Life is too short to be wasted on being politely frightened.
Ditching the cliché.
- Stop saying you’re a “bad bitch”. Every broke chick in the club is apparently a ‘bad bitch’, until she can’t get a ride home.
Strive to be a rich bitch. - Stop with the cheap, poorly-done, overused bodycon dresses, over-priced Timberlanes, paintbrush eyelashes and buy-one-get-one-free Victoria Secret fragrances. Break from the mold. Find your signature and role with it. I shouldn’t be able to confuse you with the cast of Love & HipHop [insert unfortunate city].
- Don’t be afraid to ignore Cosmo & Glamour magazines. They are usually late anyway. Be brave, not beige.
- If the only shoe designers you can name in under 10 seconds are Guiseppe Zanotti, Christian Louboutin, and Manolo Blahnik – Oh my sweet, summer child…
Proving yourself wrong. Challenge accepted is the motto. Meet that deadline with 10 minutes left on the clock. Pull up your fucking grades. Do so well on the project that you scare your partners with your new-found level of productivity. Prove the doubters wrong. You are only a failure if you give up.
Detoxing. Stop smoking. Stop drinking. Take a week off from sex. Put down the cheeseburger. Take a shower. Put on a mask. Exfoliate. Get in touch with your hygiene and health. Drink water. Get some sleep. Moisturize your soul or some shit. Your body is a machine; take care of the run-done bitch.
Acting your wage… Don’t ball out just to create a facade of carefree-ness in your life. If you live in the projects and drive a lamborghini, ‘daft’ is an understatement. Don’t shop at Nordstrom when you should be working at Rainbow. Don’t buy the fucking fur coat if you survive on government cheese. Wait a year.
FEROCIOUSLY x NICE 